RE: [gnso-dow123] Recommendation 1 task force report

["Marilyn Cade" <marilynscade@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

I appreciate seeing this, Maria. I offer some thoughts to you and Jordyn on
some organizational changes in the report so that it is easier for the TF to
discuss and then act on it. These are not substance comments but are about
organizing the materials a little more logically. I know there is no
"template", but offer these suggestions. 

 

The Report is to be the report that concludes the work and passes the
recommended policy along to Council for "consensus"
determination/discussion.

 

Thus, while it is a little hard to write the final sections that summarize
tomorrow, I suggest that you organize the ?FINAL DRAFT WHOIS TASK FORCE
REPORT on the Recommend... etc." so that it can actually be the final
transmission to the Council. You can do this by making some organizational
changes in the beginning of the report and adding in a section or two that
is blank but is already "numbered" and shows : "To be completed after
Tuesday's TF working session" or something like that".

 

For instance in the beginning of the report, you need to have a couple of
sentences in that section that is drafted that describes the most recent
process. .. I think that Roman I should actually be about the total process.
Right now it is just about the initial part of the process. The Introduction
section should/could have the full summary encompassed, with the sub points
to incorporate what has just happened, and then incorporate the Final Task
Force Discussion and Recommendation to Council, including the "vote". By the
way, in the body of 1, it should probably read "final DRAFT WHOIS Task
Force.

 

I am trying to suggest, in a rather clumsy way, I fear, that you should be
actually  "updating" the "old 1"  to include what has transpired with a
couple of sentences.  

 

1.2 does that. However, the heading is not correct. The public comments were
not "voting" on the recommendation. They were commenting on the
recommendation. :-) 

 

1.3 is "old news, and references what transpired to get the document ready
for posting/review and discussion by Council. This is needed but belongs
logically with the rest of the work on the Preliminary Stages of work? which
led up to the posting for public comment? so you really need a new 1.4 which
is where you would put the "new/tomorrow's vote".

 

That means you need to put this present 1.3 elsewhere, perhaps under 2.
Relabel 2, and put the Constituency statements into 2 as a sub element, but
have the other relevant sections and sentences that are relevant from your
present Roman 1 there so it is a "section" about the preliminary work, etc.


 

Since the documentation of the vote [ tomorrow]  becomes 1.4, you can now
reserve 1.3 for the "Final Task Force Discussion  Summary", and put into
that the few sentences or a paragraph or two that you and Jordyn agree
summarizes tomorrow's discussion/for quick agreement by the TF. OF course,
it can't be drafted yet, but it can be set up for quick turn around.  

 

I know there is not an easy to follow format, but here is a summary of my
suggestion:

Make Roman II now about the Preliminary Report and the earlier relevant
work. Make the New Roman I about the present stage, etc. 

 

Of course, you will need to have an introduction and background section in
the new Roman I that does encompass the entire process, but that is just
adding in a couple of sentences to that section, I think. 

 

The report would then be organized into the Preliminary Report section; with
a new Final Discussion/recommendations Section as the new I.  It should have
DRAFT on it for now, until discussed. 

 

Again, you would have a few "blank" sections... such as sections ready for
the incorporation of the discussion and "vote" from the TF. [similar to 1.3
but blank until after the vote.]

 

Call me if I've created too much confusion. I am just thinking of how this
will be received and processed by Councilors who are not engaged in the TF
and we want to have it very logically organized, both for them, and for the
stakeholders who are also going to read it.

 

Marilyn

 

-----Original Message-----
From: owner-gnso-dow123@xxxxxxxxx [mailto:owner-gnso-dow123@xxxxxxxxx] On
Behalf Of GNSO.SECRETARIAT@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sent: Monday, May 16, 2005 2:56 AM
To: gnso-dow123@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: [gnso-dow123] Recommendation 1 task force report

 

[To: gnso-dow123[at]gnso.icann.org]

 

Dear Task Force members,

 

Attached please find the the final task force report on the 

recommendations for improving  notification and consent for the use of 

contact data in the Whois system, complete with public comments report.

 

The report will be discussed during the Whois combined task force 123 

call on Tuesday 17 May, 2005, at 9:30 EST, 13:30 UTC.

 

Thank you.

Kind regards,

 

Glen de Saint Géry

GNSO Secretariat - ICANN

gnso.secretariat[at]gnso.icann.org

http://gnso.icann.org