Re: [gnso-osc-ops] SOI/DOI Procedures: Now Section 5

[Julie Hedlund <julie.hedlund@xxxxxxxxx>]

Ken,

Thank you very much.

Work Team members -- please note that I also have posted this document to the 
wiki at: https://st.icann.org/icann-osc/index.cgi?gnso_operations_team.

Best regards,

Julie


On 2/25/10 3:10 PM, "Ken Bour" <ken.bour@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:

GCOT Members:

Although not specifically asked to provide this service, after reading the 
document several times, I noticed a number of areas that I thought could be 
improved.  I took the liberty of editing many sections to enhance clarity 
according to my understanding of the GCOT’s intent with respect to each section 
as well as the document’s overall flow and integrity.

Although I recommend that team members read this entire version carefully and 
critically, I have also itemized below the substantive edits that I made to the 
text:
•         All sections are now renumbered and formatted to be consistent with 
the GNSO Operating Procedures.  I am recommending that this material be 
inserted as Section 5-Statements of Interest and Disclosures of Interest.  You 
will note that I added many sub-section and paragraph headings to improve 
readability and ease of reference.   I noticed that there were no acronyms 
(e.g. SOI or DOI) used in the document and I did not introduce them in this 
version.   It is my opinion that judicious use of abbreviations might make the 
text a bit less arduous to read in places, especially since SOI and DOI appear 
to be commonly used in the community.  If this matter has already been 
considered by the team and decided, please let me know.

·         5.1 Definitions:  minor wording changes to improve clarity, e.g. 
added “written statement” to both SOI and DOI; changed “direct or indirect” to 
“direct and indirect.”

·         5.2.1 Purpose:  replaced the original text with a new paragraph to 
reflect what this policy encompasses.

·         5.2.2 Compliance:  attached to paragraph (b), I inserted a comment to 
inquire of the team what Staff’s role is specifically intended to entail.   The 
current language is confusing, in my opinion, and should be tightened up or 
removed.

·         5.3.1 Timeliness:  rewrote portions for clarity.  Changed the 
participation requirement from “acknowledgement of receipt” to “A completed 
SOI, updated at least annually, is a precondition…”   Rationale:  if a 
participant supplied an updated SOI, but did not have acknowledgement of 
receipt (does proof have to be provided?), it did not seem reasonable that 
he/she would be prohibited from participation.

·         5.3.2 Electronic Form and Publication:  enhanced the description of 
Staff’s responsibilities and added an alternative arrangement (e.g. email) per 
the discussion in yesterday’s teleconference.

·         5.4.2 Duty to Remind Participants and Speakers:  attempted to clear 
up Legal’s concern about the polling language in (a) and clarified the meaning 
of a “question” so that it does not involve completeness or accuracy -- covered 
in 5.5.

·         5.5.1 Completeness:  modified to make unresolved completeness issues 
follow the appeal mechanism in 5.5.3.

·         5.5.2 Accuracy:  added the perceived omission of a direct or indirect 
declaration and made all accuracy concerns subject to the appeal mechanism.

·         5.6 Failure to Comply:  new section to address what happens if a SOI 
is not submitted at all (5.5.1 -- not previously handled) and, in 5.6.2, 
rewrote the material dealing with suspensions so that it applies not only to 
the Council, but to any work team/group.


I hope that my suggestions are perceived to have improved the document’s 
clarity – that was certainly my intent.   Your feedback is welcome and I would 
be pleased to make any additional edits/changes that the team deems appropriate.

Ken Bour